This is my song

What song best says who you are? Not the song which you think others would associate with you, but the song which, to your mind, best describes you. The one you yourself most identify with.

Yesterday I was flicking through facebook, and I came across a post asking this question. I have no idea where I read it, or who posted it, but the person was suggesting that the song ‘Happy’ by Pharrell Williams best summed them up. So I began to wonder, what is my song?

Immediately one song came to mind. It is ‘Concrete Angel’ by Martina McBride.

Generally speaking anyone who knows me now would probably think of me as relatively chilled out, content and photo credit: <a href="">Ed Yourdon</a> via <a href="">photopin</a> <a href="">cc</a>happy. However this is not the person I have always been, and to this day a part of me can never forget the girl I used to be.

Whilst I do not sing it from the rooftops, I do not hide the fact that as a teenager I was abused. Not by a member of my family I hasten to add. It does not define me, but it is a part of my past. During those years my world was a lonely place to live in. Whenever I hear this song, time slips away, and I clearly remember that troubled girl I used to be. I remember her isolation, living alone, in a world of so many. I remember her belief that this was her lot, and I remember feeling lost and at times very lonely.

During those years I spent a lot of time inside my own head, battling to survive. I often went away to a different world, to a place where I was happy, where I could be free. It was part of what kept me strong, and allowed me to eventually survive.

The words of this song perfectly describe that escape.

‘The teacher wonders but she doesn’t ask
It’s hard to see the pain behind the mask
Bearing the burden of a secret storm
Sometimes she wishes she was never born

Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In a world that she can’t rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where she’s loved
Concrete angel’

That girl is a long way from where I am today, but deep down she never really left me. We have shared a lot of hard times together, and I will always be grateful for her strength, and her ability to survive.

Thankfully for me life got a whole lot better, and I now live in that world, which at the time I could only dream of, with a man, who at the time I could never have imagined.

This is my song. What is yours?

photo credit: Ed Yourdon via photopin cc
photo credit: โ˜….stellar.โ˜… via photopin cc

21 thoughts on “This is my song

    1. Great song. Says a lot about you. What a great idea for a class discussion. I’d say your students will get a lot out of that. What age are they?

  1. this is perfect for you tric, based on what you’ve shared about what you went through and what you were like then. as for me, ‘learning to fly’

  2. I’ve never thought of a song for ‘me’. I don’t know if I could “pick” just one. I love your song choice. There are a few songs I connect to very strongly like Pink’s “Perfect” and Emersons Drives “Moments” or “I’ve Had My Moments”.

    1. I’d never heard Moments, lovely song choice, although I really love Pinks perfect. I think it is ‘perfect’ for the you I’ve come to know here.
      I too am a lot more than one song, but this one just always seems to get me.

  3. I am sorry to hear of your teen year troubles, Tric, but I am heartened that like the lyrics to Martina’s wonderful song “Concrete Angels,” you figured your way through the pain.

    It’s hard to pick one song, Tric. For me, today, I’ll go with Bruce Springsteen’s “Girls in Their Summer Clothes,” not about love, for I am very happy with my dear wife Karen, but as a metaphor for other aspects of my life as the 50s inch ever closer to 60.

  4. OMG, this song brings back all the pain and fear, and it describes it so perfectly. Once again I can feel that pain and fear that I dreaded every night. This has brought something out of me that I didn’t realize was still there. Thank you.

    1. Karen I understand completely. It is exactly that. It too brings me to a part of me that I can identify with so much, but rarely visit. Listening even for a short time I am that girl once more. Sometimes it makes me sad, but now I know my outcome I just feel sorry for that young girl I used to be, but glad I’ve come through.
      Life really is a long twisty road isn’t it. Glad you made it.

    1. Oh I didn’t see a quiz, just a comment about a song. That is probably where the comment came from. I wonder what song I’d have got? I will survive sure speaks volumes for you.

  5. Awww Tric, I can’t listen to that song without getting teary eyed, even more so now that its your song! xx

    Mine is deffo Kelly Clarkson’s Because of You, glad you reminded me coz it pushes me to give my kids better than what I had xx

    1. Yaz how selfless are you. Here am I posting a song for me, and for you your song is for your children. You are a great Mom.
      Despite the sad memories this song evokes, I like it, as I am at the stage when I can look back and know I got through it, eventually.
      I love your song choice and of course I too relate to most of Pink.

      1. Oh no, wasn’t thinking like at all chicken. It’s still my song but just reminds me of my actions you know and like you say can remind you of things you’ve got through xx I just love everything by Pink! Dying to see her some day in concert ๐Ÿ™‚ xx

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