I took part in a writing challenge during the week, to write 200 words on ‘Home’.
I adapted an old post about not asking for help, and this is what I came up with.
As a child I lived in a happy home,
five children, loving parents and a dog.
Life was all it should be,
until he came along,
and I sailed away unnoticed.
I could see my family on the mainland,
and sometimes tried to visit,
but even surrounded by them,
I could not join in.
They became strangers.
It was lonely on my island.
Islanders are different,
aloof, reserved, and quiet.
Unwelcoming of visitors,
So no one ever came.
For six years I lived,
in secret and alone.
Each day I checked my island walls,
ensuring there were no cracks.
No glimmer of light shone through.
Then, out of nowhere a stranger came
and took no notice of the walls.
He failed to see my isolation,
and uninvited, climbed onto my island
My life changed once more.
For a while we wandered together
as slowly my high walls crumbled,
until one day hand in hand,
he gently coaxed me from my island,
to a place we now call home.
photo credit: Liz Grace via photopin cc
31 thoughts on “Home”
I was having a huge empathy bomb… and then finished the poem. 🙂 This was lovely, Tric.
Thanks Jackie. I must read it to himself. 🙂
I really enjoyed this. It takes us from a high to a low and back up high again. What a journey!
Yes indeed, with a happy ever after. 🙂
This has a wonderfully gentle flow to it. The island imagery is perfect, and I like the mystery regarding the “he” that you don’t quite spell out.
Thank you. I’m delighted to get your feedback. I was only saying today that it is impossible to review your own writing.
Oh, Tric, that is startling. Beautiful.
Thank you. I like it too which I don’t always feel about something I write. 🙂
Oh, I really liked this. I can so relate to the feeling of home and the breaking down of island walls. I would love to hear this read aloud in an Irish accent it would sound so beautiful.
Thanks Charlene. I hope you are doing well, and enjoying your art. You’ll have to find an Irish friend to read it for you, as I’m a bit camera shy. 🙂
Native Irish are hard to find in my neck of the woods here in South Carolina. I will just have to dream about a visit to your neck of the woods. Oh, the drawings are coming along. I have 8 finished and working on the 9th. After that only 8 more to go.
beautiful and powerful, tric.
Thanks beth. Glad you liked it.
beautiful and moving, tric
[damn, it’s dusty in here!]
Ah you old softy. Thanks Duncan.
I read this last night, tric; but I couldn’t think of words adequate enough. I thought about it throughout the day. Beautifully understated – and all the more powerful for that. I hope it felt good creating this.
I read your comment yesterday, but was away most of the day, and I was delighted to know it had stayed with you. Thank you.
I even read it to himself after a few drinks last night. He said… Thank you. 🙂
An emotive and fantastic piece of writing, absolutely love it.
Thank you. I found it easy to write which sometimes happens when something really hits me. I’m lucky to have found ‘home’. Glad you enjoyed it.
Beautiful. I’m glad you found your happy-ever-after.
Yes I agree, and to know and appreciate it too. Life is good.
Tric, that just gave me goosebumps. Totally and completely relate and resonate. Just **wow** xxxxxxxxx
Thanks Emily. A happy home, which is a port in a storm is more than some have. We are lucky aren’t we.
Beautiful and very poignant xx
Thank you. Glad you felt that reading it.
Thanks. This is what I wish for you, someday soon.
Thanks Tric! I want that too. 🙂
Wow Tric, beautiful x