Nothing in Life is certain.
When I was young I dreamed big dreams,
but most of them came to nothing.
I also presumed that life would be long,
like my grandparents was.
Then my father got sick,
and I watched him die,
and life changed.
For a time I could not be happy.
My fathers untimely death,
shook my world.
I was no longer sure of anything.
I felt it robbed me of a future.
Not just a future with my Dad,
but my own future,
the idea that I would have one.
Time marched on,
and despite my worries,
I came to realize I was wrong.
Having children allowed me a rethink.
I may not have a future,
who knows,
but I did have a life.
Instead of thinking there may be no tomorrow,
I began to really understand,
the miracle of today.
Every minute of the day is a gift.
Each night as I go to bed,
I look in on whatever children are at home,
and pause to think of the ones who are away.
I then smile to myself,
and say “Phew, another day over,
and we are all safe”.
My husband thinks this is a very pessimistic way to live.
He sees it as waiting for disaster.
I see it as thankful for today.
I am not sure which of us appreciates life more,
Personally I think I do.
For he is happy to take each day as it comes,
I on the other hand,
am happy to live each day as it comes.
A subtle but significant difference.
photo credit: allegr0 via photopin cc
photo credit: marktrash via photopin cc
My thoughts on a page. 
“Phew, another day over,
and we are all safe”
never used to worry about the future, tric – now the thought of there not being one bothers me
you are thankful when a day is over and all is well
I am thankful another one has started and all is well
At least we both want a future! Anyway Duncan “the devil looks after his own” so I presume you and I will live a long time to come! 🙂
Beautifully written as always, Tric. “I presumed that life would be long… and things changed.” That hit me hard. I had the same realisation when a classmate died when I was a child, and again as a young adult at my first and last football match. Since then I have been very aware of how privileged we are to have each day with those we love. hashtagfeelingemotional.
Yes I agree. It is good sometimes to take stock and realize just how lucky we are. If I could have my Dad back for just one day……
HUGxx
I do the same. And I have hope for our collective future. I am so thankful when my little family has made it safely through a day. I felt that way when we made it to kindergarten again – peacefully.. and on picture day. Thankful each day for the joy my daughter feels when I pick her up .. 🙂
Yes. It is so lovely when they are small, as you can actually feel how much your children love you. Hope it lasts a lifetime for you.
Putting theses moments in our hearts. 🙂
“Phew, another day over, and we are all safe” I can appreciate this. I thank God just about every night for another day.
I think the older I get the louder and more heartfelt the “Phew!”.
Most definitely.
I don’t want a long life…call it selfish. I have someone in Heaven waiting for me and when the day is over for me I say…”One day closer to Heaven.” As you have already posted, those lovely days of little ones all over the place making noise…needing cookies…watching Teletubbies……sitting in my lap playing itsy bitsy spider…..and family gatherings with everyone there…are over for me. It has completely changed my outlook on the day ending.
I can fully understand your feelings and thoughts on this post. I can remember my own mum after my Dad died in his early fifties. Even though she was super with us, we saw a spark in her had gone out and we could feel her wishing she could leave to join him. It did take a long long time but she is still here, over twenty years later, and has made a massive contribution to ours and others lives.
Your blog is a wonderful help I am sure to those who find it.
I feel for you. In your position I cannot imagine how I would be. I remember hearing a mum once describe her life after one of her children died and she said she was like a rose, continuing to grow but one that would never bloom again. I am sure Brandon will give you strength and is trying to help you somehow.
Thank you, Tric. I don’t want to spoil your party with my input/grief but I do know what you are saying in your post about “one day being over.” I remember being a busy mom when that had a totally different meaning. I would so tired and glad to lay my head down. Circumstances always play into our take on life. Being a mom is THE most wonderful thing to be in my opinion. I would never, ever change that and I know you are the same way. God bless you. I know you are much loved. Love and blessings from Florida.
You are right to ‘live each day as it comes’. If life isn’t for living, then what is it for?
I feel like I’m living that reality now. Every day is a blessing!
I did think of you and your situation as I was posting this.
Subtle and significant, indeed. If there were no tomorrow, you lived today to the max.
That’s what I hope anyway! I can’t say every night I feel I have achieved that but I do go to sleep thankful for what I have.
i love the ending of this piece
Thanks. One word can make quite a difference. 🙂
I lean toward your way of thinking…I feel at peace at night when my kids are safe and sound in bed. A feeling that all is right with the world
Yes very much so. And now my children are older I particularly love to know all are tucked up in bed!