Death Row

Our family pet of sixteen and a half years,
is on death row.
Her sentence began at Christmas,small__3303350813
when she had a small stroke.
She made a good recovery initially,
but her bladder function has not.

I will not share too much information,
suffice to say each day my time is taken with,
washing floors, baskets and a dog!

It could not go on,
but it has taken these past three months,
for the whole family to understand the extent of the problem,
and to face up to the inevitable.

When I say the whole family, I lie.
My eleven year old will not accept it.small__6978725888
She loves our dog,
and despite spending the least amount of years with her,
she is the closest to her of all my children.

Yesterday I moved things on and visited the vet.
The appointment was made for tomorrow at 12.20!

Since then I can’t help but feel like an executioner.
My faithful companion for so many years,
has no idea as she comes wagging her tail towards me,
what I am planning.
As I was petting her this morning I felt like judas.

Today I should be spending all the time in the world with her,
but I cant, it is just too difficult.
As I was putting out her dinner,
I realised we have eight jars of food left,
but she has just one day.
Needless to say I overfed her,
which she was delighted with.
And for the rest of today she will be given
a plentiful supply of biscuits and treats.

Thankfully there is no need to prepare her for tomorrow.
She will get all excited when I get her lead,
and will happily get into the car.
Putting her to sleep will be the easy part.
Dealing with my youngest will be difficult.small__3352234052

And yet when this is all over I know without any doubt,
that my daughter will move on so quickly.
She will shed tears and feel lonely,
but spend hours on the internet looking at puppies.
In a weeks time it will only be me,
missing her presence,
and aching to pet her just once more.

A number of times today I was sorely tempted to ring the vet.
I could cancel it for one more week.
But no the time has come.
She will not get a stay on her execution,
Today is her last day on death row!

photo credit: alfredlee via photopin cc
photo credit: johnmuk via photopin cc
photo credit: Maja_Larsson via photopin cc

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24 thoughts on “Death Row

  1. That 11 year old may have to make a similar decision about her “mum” one day. Think about that. I’ve been trying to be more patient with my dog and love on her some more since she’s only got a couple years tops left. They suck when they make us sad like this.

    1. your link worked! lovely. Its just life and today was rotten, but we’ll move on quickly and some other drama will unfold, I have no doubt. Thanks for the thoughts.

  2. Awww sorry honey. My Ally has been on death row for a year and a half. She has cancer. She had pain this summer, but she seems better now. Her leg is about the size of her body. I wish you peace and love ((Hugs)).

  3. I think all folk who’ve shared their house with an animal have experienced those same feelings of sadness and guilt you describe – I know I have.

    Will be thinking of you tomorrow

    (((((((((( HUG ))))))))))

  4. Our beloved Honey is getting old too. She’s not quite there yet but I’ve been noticing her slowing down and have started pointing it out to the others….I thought to prepare them. Reading your post has made me realize I’m actually preparing myself more. (Hugs!!!)

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