We all feel grief differently.

I have been severely under the weather with flu, manflu, swine flu, or God knows what,  since last Friday.  I’m sure I’ll survive, but my creative side is definitely not functioning. So instead, for anyone who wishes, I will repost an old post which made me laugh when I first wrote it.  I hope you enjoy it. For those of you who read it before I apologise. Hopefully I’ll be back soon.


Anyone who read yesterdays blog,
will know we had a very sad day.small__5025870260
Our dog has gone to chase rabbits,
on that farm in the sky.
After all the upset and drama,
we are now left quiet and a bit empty.
My youngest daughter is devastated,
my husband marginally upset.

But it has got me thinking.
In our family we have six personalities.
Each one of us deals with upset and sadness differently.
From my youngest who wears her heart on her sleeve,
and is not afraid to cry (loudly),
a lot like her mum!
to my husband of over twenty years,
who I saw shed a few tears for the first time last year.

These differences in our reactions to life’s issues,
were made evident to me many years ago when I miscarried.
Of course I was very upset and so was my husband.
Time went by and he recovered,
quite quickly if I am to be honest.
I took longer but as I have said before,
time is a great healer,
and soon I too began to feel better.

One evening our local priest called.
My husband has a huge interest in GAA,small__779806745
which is our national sports of hurling and gaelic football.
This priest was hoping to recruit him,
to help teach the local youths.

A cup of tea was offered and they were off,
talking in great detail about matches played back who knows when,
and amazing goals scored and poor refereeing decisions etc.
GAA is not a passion I share and it was barely noticed when I left.
After a while I returned to remove the cups etc.
They stopped talking and the priest said,
” I believe you had your own loss recently, I’m very sorry.”
Before I could say a word my husband replied,
I know Father, it was terrible, we were beaten in the first round of the championships!

The priest looked at my husband,
and then at me.
No one spoke for a moment, then I said to my husband,
Actually I think he was referring to the miscarriage!”
My husband was mortified.
“Oh thank you Father, that was terrible too” he said.

So by this and many other examples,
I have learned over the years,
that whilst we all have good and bad days,
different events mean more to some of us than others.
Of course my husband is aware of our grief today,
but may not really share its depth with us.
Equally, if Cork do not make it to the All Ireland Final in September,
I must be honest,
I may not share his grief either!
To each their own.

photo credit: filin ilia – aliyo.hu via photopin cc
photo credit: Kman999 via photopin cc

29 thoughts on “We all feel grief differently.

  1. just as funny the 2nd time round::lol:

    P.S. you’re taking a while to throw off this flu – a couple of hot toddies would have done the trick by now !

    1. I am never sick but this…… I tried the alcohol but it tore the throat of me! Don’t worry though I’ll be back. And guess who is having a birthday next week. I am going to make up for this dry patch in a big way then.

        1. Ha ha, there’s light between me and it yet smartie! Although if this last week is to be repeated I’ll be glad to make it that far. 🙂

  2. Get yourself a wee hot whiskey. I’m on my second (convinced I have swine flu) and it’s doing the job.
    Men express themselves differerently. Same happened to me and my dad stipulated how my husband might not react in the same way as I do and not to worry about it. He was right and I was so glad he told me.

    1. Time taught me many lessons, but I do still laugh when I remember this night. My husband is actually more in tune now than he was as a younger man, so in a way we are more in tune than we used to be. He has never lived down this night.

  3. this is so, so funny tric. kind of puts the universe into perspective, as seen through the eyes of another’s perspective. feel better soon, my friend.

    1. Thanks. I did enjoy reposting this one. I’m hopeful tomorrow will be the beginning of my feeling better. Are you off on hols yet?

  4. I have been there and I know what you feel. My first friend, Cyrano, a Collie left a hole in my heart. My second Daisey, Old English Sheep dog made me feel like I could never have another friend again but I did and you will too. I have pictures and at times I smile cause our current dog, another Old English Sheep dog does something that reminds me of one of his others. It’s sad but I can say none are forgotten.

  5. Feel better Tric. Having another rough go of it for the Husband’s family. Their third loss in less than 2 years. Heart ache for sure. And definitely a lot of ways grief is shown.

Comments are always welcome.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s