Newsflash! Polar Vortex in Ireland too.

I know there is a polar vortex in areas of the United States.
It is so cold in some areas schools are cancelled.
They estimate 118 million people are feeling its effects.

Well I’d like to correct Sky news, CNN and our own local radio channel RTE.
Their figures are incorrect.
118 million and 1 are feeling the effects of a polar vortex.
I, in case you are wondering, am the 1!

Today is day seven with no heat in our house.
Yes, I certainly know what a polar vortex feels credit: <a href="">jamelah</a> via <a href="">photopin</a> <a href="">cc</a>

I’m sure there are many among you who will say this is the way it was in the olden days.
Well I’d like to assure you, despite some of you imagining otherwise,
I was not alive then to experience it.

I believe I am one of those whose DNA was very receptive to change.
As a result, from birth I have known heat, and my body thermometer has adapted accordingly.
In laymans terms, I hate the cold. I do not function in the cold.

Day one of my misery began with a loud banging noise coming from the boiler.
I had no clue what to do other than to turn it off.
Similar to when my car breaks down and I open the bonnet and look at the engine,
I sat for a short time and looked at the boiler, its pipes, timer and plug.

I then touched a few things, turned some buttons and wondered had I fixed it?
I turned it on again.
For a few seconds it fired as before. Result.
Then bang, bang, bang.(It actually made noises a lot more spectacular than bang, bang,bang, but I’m at a loss how to describe them).photo credit: <a href="">Airwolfhound</a> via <a href="">photopin</a> <a href="">cc</a>
Just for a split second I was tempted to do as they do in action movies,
run for cover and dive in spectacular style over my kitchen table before that boiler blew!
However I am braver than that, and instead quickly turned it off.

Hours later my husband arrived home.
Now when I say “husband” some of you may get the picture of your own DIY talented husbands.
These would be the husbands who, on arriving home, know exactly what to do.
Well suffice to say my husbands talents lie in other directions.
He purposely walked towards the dead boiler.
He too looked at it and twiddled a few nobs, so far an approach very similar to my own.
Then he added one masterful addition.
When he turned it on and the violent bang, bang, banging began, he lifted his hand and he banged that boiler right back!
Before eventually declaring “Ye it’s dead”.

Day two and three were a bit of a novelty, and the dropping temperature inside our well insulated house did not seem too bad.
By day four and five the house was definitely getting colder.
Yesterday and today I began to worry.
I checked regularly for signs of frost bite, but thankfully I am okay so far.

You will be glad to hear however that the end is in sight.
As I type my saviour has arrived.
Not exactly Jesus but the next best thing. The new boiler man (our pet name for him).
In a matter of hours I will be able to remove my coat.
No more drives in the car just to feel heat.
No more “cold” calling to friends in the hope their house is warm.

As I can almost smell the heat, I decided not to go out to lunch.
No, instead I’d stay home and make a lovely soup.
I braved the freezing kitchen and chopped everything I could find.
I even noticed myself humming.
The soup would warm me up and the house would soon feel credit: <a href="">Photo Extremist</a> via <a href="">photopin</a> <a href="">cc</a>

I placed my huge pot of soup on the hob, and turned it on.
No soup, no lunch.
What sort of an eejit am I?
My saviour had turned off the gas to put in the new boiler!

Hopefully by the time I post this we will be roasting.
Until then I’m off to make a cup of hot tea.
Unless he’s turned the electricity off too!

photo credit: Airwolfhound via photopin cc
photo credit: jamelah via photopin cc
photo credit: Photo Extremist via photopin cc

17 thoughts on “Newsflash! Polar Vortex in Ireland too.

  1. That’s rough! Here in Florida, we aren’t faring well in the 40 and 50 degree chills. I’m one of the tough floridians who hasn’t turned on the heat. Others caved in and cranked that sucker up because unlike normal people, we can die of hypothermia if it is below 55 outside.

  2. In Jersey we’ve gotten down to 7 degrees. My daughter is three hours from my cousin in Chicago where it was -20 degrees. Everyone is staying home.

  3. Seven days with no heat? That is terrible! I can’t even imagine. A fireplace or the oven would soon become my best friend if I were in your shoes. Glad to hear you’re getting it fixed. Maybe your husband can watch the boiler man and get some pointers on what to do, if this ever happens again. He’s funny though. Just hit it and it’ll work.

  4. oh tric< i'm so sorry you had to go through that – and for so long! i love your and your hub's repair strategy, exactly as i would have done. next time this happens, know that my cottage door is always open to all of you. happy you'll have your soup and your heat very soon ) beth

  5. We had a heat wave today. We broke zero and soared in to the twenties! Farenhiet (i have no idea how to spell that) so I’m not sure what that is in “c”.

    I hope the heat is on and the soup is cooking! These Polar Vortex’s are nothing to mess with!

  6. So sorry to hear that you were seven days without heat! We had the furnace, a couple of electric heaters and blankets on and the temp in our house was still 55 degrees F. We find 70-72 comfortable for the most part. 30-45 mph winds, and 15″ of snow and high temp of -5 BEFORE wind chill factor taken into account. BRRR!!! Only thing I could do was CLEAN (yuck) to work up a sweat to keep warm. Trouble is, place still looks like crap! Glad you’re back in the warmth tho!

  7. I’m glad you see the funny side of it! We heat with wood, and when we nearly ran out just before Christmas we discoered that nobody could deliver us any before January! We ended up raiding the local tip for wood that people had thrown away when gardening – talk about going back to your roots, hunter-gatherers and all that jazz 🙂

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