To all who hate teenagers…

Today I read a thread in a facebook page ranting about teenagers. They ranted about bad manners, ‘the youth of today’, I blame the parents and lots more besides. I suspect it was written for the most part by parents of young children.teenagers
How I smiled reading that thread.

These parents of younger children are blissfully unaware that the day will come when their little ones will join the merry band of youth that are ‘teenagers’. They have no idea that despite their best parenting, their little angels will not always behave as they should. Just as their little ones were never going to eat sweets, have too much screen time or have a meltdown in public.

How do I know all this? Because I was once that mother.

Once upon a time I went to the playground and was furious that teenagers ran around it almost knocking over my little ones. I saw young girls with outfits on going to a disco that I’d never allow my young teenager to wear. I gave out about the numbers of hooded teenagers making noise outside when my little ones were trying to sleep in the Summer. Or the brats who sauntered across the road while I had to brake in case I ran them over.

Until one day my fairy tale ended and reality bit me. I had teenagers who despite my best efforts, on occasions did everything I’d photo credit: ashley rose, via photopin ccthought they wouldn’t. For a while I turned into Miss Marple, doing my best to keep track of what they were up to, while sometimes just hoping they were behaving. I despaired at modern living and how different things were in my day.

And then I remembered…the less than perfect teenager I once was. The one who sauntered across roads as if she owned them, who thought she knew it all, who didn’t much care for boundaries and pushed them regularly to the limit. I remember also my mother saying, “In my day…”

So I have little doubt that the majority of those teenagers who are upsetting the mothers in the face book thread today will soon grow out of those teenage years and will in time join the ranks of parents of young children who despair of teenagers and are sure they will never have one.

But they will.

photo credit: ashley rose, via photopin cc
photo credit: louisa_catlover via photopin cc

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29 thoughts on “To all who hate teenagers…

    1. Thank you Sue. As you know I have a soft spot for the normal brat teenager having dealt with many, but I do also know they are often exasperating and their bad behaviour not excusable.

        1. Ah I do know there are some who haven’t a chance in life Sue, but I think the majority turn out not so bad in the end.

  1. I sort of like teenagers…always had at least one in my fridge. Or pantry. Or at table. Even so, I always liked that quote “Few things are more satisfying than seeing your children have teenagers of their own.” πŸ™‚

    1. Thank Michael. I popped over for a read. That photo says it all. It’s certainly not what we imagined but in many ways it’s even greater.

        1. My daughters cringe at the thought they possess all or any of their mother’s traits, but that is a whole different story..

    1. I think the greatest advice I ever got as a mother was during one of my children’s teenage years. We were not ‘friends’ and I was really missing the relationship we once had. Then one day a mother of older children who saw an interaction between us and how hurt I was after. She came up to me after and said, “I promise she will come back and you’ll be as close as ever.” I couldn’t imagine it at the time but it made a big difference. I needed to hear it and yes she was spot on.
      Teenagers…not easy but inevitable!

  2. so funny and true. i told my daughters that they probably couldn’t get away with much because i’d done most of the bad things that i could possibly do. even so, they found new things….)

    1. Having met you I can indeed believe you were capable of quite an amount as a teenager! In this house my gang take after their Dad mostly so life hasn’t been quite as difficult as it might have been. Thank goodness.

  3. Hi there Tric, it’s been a while πŸ™‚ I hope you’re well. I loved this post. I am currently proudly submerged in a sea of teenagers who have passed their exams and are now enjoying the summer. Every part of parenthood has its pros and cons as our little ones grow up; the most important thing is to watch your own and not miss a minute, rather than comment about how everyone else is dealing with theirs.

    1. Delighted to hear from you MM. I’ve not been online half as much as I used to be. I often wonder how you and your gang are doing. Good to hear all well and exams over successfully.
      I love your advice to just look after our own. That is indeed good counsel.

  4. Great post! I remember when we lived in a very quiet, elderly estate and hubby was laughing at the fact that everyone was commenting on how lovely our little men were and simultaneously giving out about three young teenaged boys because they were hanging around (they were standing nearby chatting, nothing more!).

    1. Haha. Yes I’m always amused, since I’ve had teenagers, how they are all viewed in the same way regardless of how harmless they are.
      Thankfully it’s a phase that doesn’t last forever but it’s not one parents share any information on other than all is going well, despite the fact that my kids will I told me things which tell me that things are anything but.
      A bit like no one ever gets to hear from the parent whose child is the bully, but they must be out there.

  5. I always smile at the comments about teenagers. Like you, Tric, I was one once and I raised a few, too. I think teenagers have been challenging their parents since the beginning of time and continue to do so despite our best efforts.

  6. It’s amazing how views change when the shoe is on the other foot. Being a teenager today is so much harder than it was when I was growing up. We didn’t have social media, passive aggressive bullying a constant feed of what it means to be a “perfect woman”. I think I was most concerned about when my breasts were going to grow and if I had enough pads and IB profen for when my period came on. I feel so sorry for teenagers these days and for the parents that have to help them navigate through this wicked and unjust world, especially if you’re raising a girl. I find this website to be extremely helpful.https://www.jw.org/en/bible-teachings/family/teenagers/#?insight%5Bsearch_id%5D=53d20b6d-9a34-4242-b744-8edbf39cff45&insight%5Bsearch_result_index%5D=0

  7. Being an older teenager, but still a teenager non the less, I must agree with this! We do things our parents may not like or support, but we also do so many things that make our parents so very proud of us and I wouldn’t change that for the world!

  8. I’m a teenager, I just started my blog in fact! This is the first blog post I have read on here and I think it was the perfect one to start with. Yes, I agree with you, you wrote so perfectly and were completely honest. It would mean the world to me if you looked at my blog because I am wanting to write about the perspective of teenagers and I’m hoping that it would interest you! https://ateenagersperspectiveblog.wordpress.com/

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