For you my friend.

As November draws to a close it does so with a difficult final week. Tuesday November 29th is Daniel’s anniversary. Three years this year. He should be sixteen, pushing the teenage boundaries and beginning to blossom into the young man he would become. He should have beaten leukemia a childhood cancer with a very high recovery rate. He, like many other young children this year, should not have got cancer. It’s not the way life should be.

It’s difficult to go through this week without replaying Daniel’s final days three years ago. The phone call to say he was coming home. The fear he would not be strong enough to make the journey. The joy at seeing the ambulance bring him in the gates of his home. The happy smile on his face when he saw he was home at last.

As the month passes I think it’s also important to know that we do not only remember Daniel with tears. This was a boy who lived his 001few short years to the max. It is impossible to speak of Danny without remembering how much fun he had every day and the life he brought with him to every occasion, regardless of whether it was appropriate or not!

However hard this is for all who knew him, this month and week are particularly difficult for his family. Daniel’s mum and I are friends for over twenty years. I thought I knew her well, but watching her deal with losing her beautiful boy and the courage and strength she shows every day continues to amaze me.

It is not possible to lessen this grief, nor should we, because it is only a reflection of how much Daniel was loved and is missed. However as the days pass I will think of this song often.

For you my friend. xxx

This is to Mother You.
Sinead O Connor.

“This is to mother you
To comfort you and get you through
Through when your nights are lonely
Through when your dreams are only blue
This is to mother you”

photo credit: Petra Senders via photopin cc

19 thoughts on “For you my friend.

  1. Oh Tric, this brings tears for Daniel and all those who loved him and continue to miss him so much; also tears for my own nephew who died 20 years ago on the 29th, aged just 24.
    I suspect that neither young man would want us crying but I’m pretty sure they would want to know that they are in our hearts always. xx

    1. I thought of you and your family too when I posted this, as they share the same anniversary.
      Twenty years and three… It would seem like a big difference in time, but we know grief moves at a different pace.
      Sometimes when I can’t imagine how I can help my friend I think of this song.
      Will be sitting in Mass on Tuesday, (like the big non believer I am), and I’ll have a word with your nephew too.

  2. Daniel and his family are in my prayers. This was a beautiful and touching post. It almost got me to tears. I couldn’t imagine what I would do without my babies. She sounds like an amazingly strong woman, I don’t know if I could possess that strength.

    1. Thank you for your kind words.
      Yes I too cannot imagine how I’d cope with losing one of my crew. Her strength is extraordinary, as is Daniel’s dad’s and all the family. It is every parents worst nightmare.

    1. Thank you Coleen. It’s hard to believe it’s three years, but no time at all for his family. Tomorrow marks the day he left but is no more sad or lonely a day than any other. As a parent, even though I see it, I cannot truly imagine it.

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