My thoughts on a page.

Today is a good day! Take a look to your right and you will see my shiny new badge. I have been shortlisted for the Irish Blog awards in the Best Personal Blog category. It says ‘short’list but actually it’s still quite a long list if you ask me. 

Late last night as I was up watching a load of rubbish on the television, I saw on facebook that the shortlist was live. I tried to stay non caring and casually went to the link, yes very casually if you must know. I went down the ridiculously long list of shortlists and to my horror I was not there. In that moment many emotions flooded through me. Disappointment being the number one. I also felt cross, on behalf of my blog. Why did they not like it? I love it. Then I realised I was looking at the wrong list. I was not nominated in Best Lifestyle but in Best Personal category. Glad that no one had heard my cries of dismay, I casually raced over to Best Personal shortlist, and there I was. Phew.

It is a good few hours now since I learned the news and I am delighted. However that moment of disappointment has made me think. Regardless of how many times we hear ourselves say, ‘What does it matter, I blog for myself’, it does in fact matter. I cared last night. I cared, that  as the writer on this blog, I was not shortlisted, and I cared that someone did not like my blog.

Last year I made it to the finals. I can see now that that was a great achievement, but as I was a very new blogger at the time, I had no appreciation of that. This year is different. I am not exactly an experienced blogger, but I am no longer new. I have grown to love my blog. It is in fact, in many ways, a part of me. As the title says it is, “My thoughts on a page”. This year these awards mean more to me. I care that I am being judged. I care that someone might not think I am up to the mark. I care what you think of me.

Today I know a number of bloggers who are disappointed. I know it sounds trite but I actually am gutted for them. Some in particular are really good bloggers, and I question their omission. Having felt disappointed last night, if only for a short while, I can imagine how they feel, and wonder is entering these awards and having your blog ‘judged’ a good thing?

However for myself it has all worked out well. I am at this moment delighted. I will probably be writing you a ‘Help I want to delete my blog because I didn’t make the finals’ post in a few weeks, but tonight all is good in my world.

Regardless of whether I make the finals I would like to take this opportunity to thank all of you who read, like and comment on my posts, and especially those of you who took the time to nominate me. What a year it has been. So many of you have stuck there right beside me. You were there to celebrate with me when the young warrior was well, you comforted me when Dan was sick, and so many of you reached out to me when we lost him. Since then you have continued to comfort and support me when needed. It has not been all misery here and we have also shared some great laughs, often at my husbands expense, and discussed a huge variety of issues. I have enjoyed enormously writing every post, but it is your interaction with me that has made the whole experience one which I can never adequately describe to a non blogger.
I am proud to number so many of you among my ‘friends’.

Thanks a million all of you, my friends.