Words Unspoken

As I write tonight it is with great sadness.
My young warrior friend is seriously ill.
Words fail me to adequately say what I feel.
I wasn’t going to post,
but now on a whim I would like to.

I have over the past months kept all my posts,
which featured my little friend,
together under the category “Bone marrow transplant”.
Tonight I want to repost one of those.

It is one of my favourite posts.
I wrote it in June of this year,
when the sun was shining and we had so much hope in our hearts.
It was a post which shared my final goodbye,
with my very close friend as she left for Dublin,
with her young boy.

Tonight as I write this I once again hold her close,
she is in my heart and as I think of her and her family,
I remember this day,
and I wish with all my heart and soul,
that we could achieve what we dreamed of that day.

Words Unspoken

I went for a final walk with my friend today,
and tried to say “Good bye”. © Copyright Chris Reynolds and licensed for reuse under this Creative Commons Licence
We spoke at length on our two hour walk,
and yet so much was left unsaid.

She and her husband are leaving their home,
and three of their children,
to go to Dublin with their young son,
for a long awaited bone marrow transplant.
They will be gone for up to three months.

As we walked along, chatting non stop as usual,
on a glorious sunny morning,
we tried to act normal.

But what is normal in this situation?

We spoke of the accommodation,
the procedure, the side effects,
and the return home.
Of consultants, nurses, friends and good wishes,
prayers and expectations.
We laughed as we always did,
and joked about nothing in particular.

Then just for one moment,
it all became too much.
Not for my friend who is so very strong,
but for me.
I felt overwhelmed by all she had ahead of her,
and how much I would miss our walks together.

I struggled and bit my tongue,
looked around and tried frantically to think of other things.
But I was not as strong as her,
my mental diversion failed miserably,
and I could not help those silent tears from falling.

As we walked on looking forward,
I battled for control.
Self indulgent hot tears streaming down my face.

For a few minutes I thought my friend was fooled,
and perhaps was not aware of my weakness.
Then suddenly mid sentence she turned to me,
and reached across to wipe my tears.

In that moment,images
on that isolated country walk,
under the bluest of skies,
we hugged each other tightly,
silently sharing without words,
all that we could not say.

Then the moment passed,
and off we went.
Two friends chatting non stop,
on a walk under the bluest of skies.
Two friends who in that moment,
had said all they needed to say.

© Copyright Chris Reynolds and licensed for reuse under this Creative Commons Licence


26 thoughts on “Words Unspoken

  1. I hesitated to press the Like button for this post, tric – for truly there is nothing to like about this situation

    there are no consoling words I can offer

    I just hope things might still turn out O.K.

    1. I wish Dunan. I wish. Thank you. My friendship with this boys mum is huge and the pain you’d feel on a night such as this hurts badly. But suddenly tonight I really wanted to remember that day.

    1. Wot good advice. I really needed to remember that day, and all our hopes and dreams. I am really hurting but my tears are a drop in the ocean compared to what my friend is experiencing.

    1. Thank you. This little boy is not my young friend but I thought he really represented him, a cute but cheeky face. It is so immeasurably sad.

  2. I hope again that that little boy will gain his strength again….for his mama and for you. I’ve thought about you ALOT lately and about all your heartache. Im sending yet another hug and positive thoughts.

    1. Thanks Tia. I know after your own recent loss that you really understand. These are very sad and difficult days. He and his family are on our minds 24/7. Hugs and positive thoughts always go down a treat.

  3. Hi Tric, remember that you have been there with your friend on her horrific journey- whether physically or in spirit. Sometimes there are no words to say, but she will get strength just knowing you care and are there if she needs you. Take care.

  4. Tric, I’ve been traveling so not commenting, but still following the journey of your young warrior friend. I’m continuing to send prayers for healing and peace for all who are connected with this young man…so sorry that things are so difficult. much love, Lucia

    1. Thanks a million. It has been four days of hell. But tonight he is critical but stable and amazing as it might seem we are all happy with that. The next 48 hours are so important. As always thank for your support. I hope you are travelling somewhere nice and you are okay.

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