God save me from Christmas shopping.

Today was a day which I had been putting off for some time. I had hidden away and ignored all the signs.
However it was no longer practical to continue along this line. I had to be brave. I had to face it.
It was time to begin my Christmas shopping.photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/jev55/6659969311/">jev55</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com">photopin</a> <a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/2.0/">cc</a>

I have learned a thing or two about myself over the years. One of those is the fact that I was not born with the correct “girl” genes. There is something amiss in my DNA.
I don’t do make up, dresses or high heels. My hair is short and gelled and I have nails, but only just. But most of all I do not do shopping. I hate it.

However I love Christmas. I really enjoy giving gifts and receiving. In order to give I must shop.
This is how my usual shopping trip goes.

I arrive at a shopping centre and flip out because I cannot get a parking spot. I circle around and never have the patience to wait when I see someone getting into their car. I drive for eternity, around and round, often expressing loudly how much I hate that poxy shopping centre. Then I admit it, occasionally, in a temper I leave for home.

If I do make it into the centre I am quickly overwhelmed by the crowds. I try to focus and remember the presents I want to buy. The joy they will bring.
I go into the appropriate shop, but as I have the item in my hand I begin to wonder. Is this really what she wants? Is it a bit too big/small? I look at the till with the huge queues and I wearily head over. By the time I am half way up the queue I have changed my mind and I leave the item back.

On other occasions I queue up, but run out of patience and walk away. How ridiculous. This just means I have to go back the next day and queue all over again.photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/this-is-my-life/2135610561/">the idealist</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com">photopin</a> <a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/">cc</a>

However my most commonly used excuse not to shop, is to wander around the various shops and convince myself that I will get a much better deal online.
So once again I head home empty handed.

However today I was determined. I needed to begin. Not a thing has been bought and December is looming. I armed myself with my kids lists, put on comfortable boots for walking and off I went.

In the first shop I went into I did brilliantly. I picked up a load of small gifts. These were exactly what I knew would be greatly enjoyed Christmas morning.
Then I went for a few of the main presents. I was on a roll.

I queued up oh so proud of myself. I had exceeded my own expectations. Shopping was okay. Even this queue wasn’t too long.
I placed my goods on the counter and smiled and greeted the cashier, as she began to check off our families Christmas. Then sweet Jesus, horror of horror, I had to say to her, “Oh dear.Please stop”.
The only method of payment I had on me was my golf membership card!

A manager was called and the “sale” was cancelled. My Christmas was returned to the shelves. The cashier and manager were most understanding about it and even laughed loudly. I was glad my children were not with me as I do not think they would have been so kind.

I think it is worth noting that the lengthening queue behind me was also distinctly lacking in Christmas Spirit.

So once again I came home empty handed.
Maybe I will go online after all.

photo credit: jev55 via photopin cc
photo credit: the idealist via photopin cc

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20 thoughts on “God save me from Christmas shopping.

  1. Ha! I have long hated shopping. Grocery. Holiday. Clothes. You name it. Interesting though…. when I go on vacation I love to shop. And put me in a office supply store with pens and paper and I can go crazy. 🙂

  2. Ah, that is harsh. So close and yet so far. I don’t mind Christmas shopping so much because I know what I am getting, so I get in and get out as fast as I can. The crowds really annoy me though, people pushing and shoving, kids running around shopping centres, a bit too claustrophobic for me…so I buy some stuff online and usually get the rest done nice and early, this year I have nothing done, I won’t have time this week and Sunday is the first of December…oh the joy that awaits me.

    1. And the Dublin crowds are double the Cork ones! I wish you luck. The poxy thing is that I can’t get the main things on line just in case they don’t arrive on time. Roll on the first of Jan.

      1. Yeah, on line can be tricky when it comes to delivery, or it gets damaged in the post and you have to return it, on line is only really any good if you are lucky enough to spot something and you immediately think of someone you know who would love it, I like to physically see something before I buy it…everything can look great on line and look really small and cheap when it arrives.

  3. i’m not a big shopper either tric, though i do love giving gifts. for some crazy reason i absolutely love the process of holiday shopping, the lines, the odd things that happen, the people, and on and on. this must be my crazy side talking. i can empathize with you though )

  4. Poor Tric… I think we’d make a good team because I missed the girl DNA too, and I absolutely HATE Christmas shopping. I think that a gold memebership card is more than adequate payment – depending on the expiry date. You play golf, huh? The only golf I know is the chocolate biscuits my Grandpop (a gentle, excentric Dubliner) used to give me.

    1. I play golf but badly when I have the time. Sounds like we do have loads in common, but then we had begun to figure that our already through our posts,,,,, sister!

  5. Oh you poor thing. That must have been so embarrassing.
    I admit, that I only have a few Christmas things put away so far. Today is the Tween’s birthday so that is the first thing to deal with.

  6. I hate shopping at the best of times but Xmas shopping really gets on my nerves

    Not the present buying bit. – I’m just in and out as quickly as possible (even quicker now when i cheat and just give everyone gift cards)

    No, what I hate is the bloody festive music that assaults my ears wherever I go and the ‘panic buying’ of groceries as xmas draws near. Everyone except me seems to buy enough food to fill two trolleys as if the shops are not going to be open for a fortnight, instead of just one day, resulting in interminable queues at the checkouts

    Ggrrrr !!!

  7. I find it really hard to choose things in shops too – I am always worried that what I buy will be wrong – and I get really tired by the crowds and the noise. This year I’m trying a new thing – I take my phone to the shops and I take pictures of all the things I *think* will be good presents, then when I’m at home and feeling relaxed I look at them and decide. Then I buy them online. I’ll only know if it works come the day!

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