Today is the day. I’ve not spoken about this, as just thinking about it causes me great anxiety. Today is the day it was decided, to book my new phone in for a minor operation.
At 2pm today I will be travelling back, to a time when the thought of carrying a phone around was unimaginable.
The mere thought of our separation makes me uneasy. How will I manage without it? What if someone texts me?
How have I become this person? I, who many years ago decided to stop wearing a watch as I felt it was ruling my life, have become addicted to my iPhone which I’ve had for just a few weeks.
Every few minutes it and I connect. I cannot resist pushing that “home” button, often unconsciously, only to discover that, no, I had not missed the bing from a new message, the vibration from an email, nor that jazzy ring tone. In reality no one had contacted me in the few short minutes since last I’d checked the phone. Do I then put the phone with no messages aside? No, not to be put off by the fact no one has anything to say to me, I then take the opportunity to go online. I check my emails and finally facebook ( as there is always something to see there).
Having received my iPhone “hit”, I can at last continue with whatever I was supposed to be doing. That’s the plan anyway, but as the minutes pass, unless I am working or very busy, I feel the itch in my finger begin once more, the need to check that home button. Maybe I missed something.
As I write this it is clear to me, that I do indeed need time and space away from my phone in order to fully address my addiction. I imagine as we say “Goodbye” that I will struggle. How will I feel leaving that shop without it? What if it beeps or rings as I walk away? Would it be acceptable to grab it, ask for it back? Maybe it would be kinder to turn it off in the car and share a quiet goodbye before handing it over.
I wonder as I leave that shop phoneless will I feel free? I imagine that the part of me which got rid of my watch all those years ago, may well sing “Hallelujah”. I will be free. No texts, no emails or calls. No twitter, facebook or internet. No interruptions of any kind.
As I work, drive, chat, help with homework, or interact with family or friends there will be no one to interrupt the moment. I really will be living that minute, not sharing it with potentially so many others.
What freedom. To actually leave the house and be completely alone. Out of contact. Maybe later I will return home and sit and read for awhile or chat. Again with no demands by outsiders on my time. Just my family and I alone together.
I really hope this forced time apart will give me a fresh insight into how intrusive I have allowed my phone to become, and how ridiculously over attached I am to it ( I even took it to the bathroom the other day!). How is it that something so small can have such a strong hold on me? Thankfully it would appear I have realised this just in time, and hopefully I can break free.
But wait…. I hear beeping. It’s my phone. It’s calling me… Excuse me, I’ll just check who it is. I’ll be back in a second…………………………………………..
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photo credit: Jorge Quinteros via photopin cc
My thoughts on a page. 
OMG. not another phone junkie. say it ain’t so tric, say it ain’t so…
Ashamed to say it’s true Mocha! I’ll try to ditch it but I’m weak. 🙂
tis tis. I reprimand, as I comment from my mobile 🙂
Yeah…it’s just like that! Can’t leave it alone for a second.
I’m determined to try to be less “addicted”. We’ll see how long I last.
I had to smile when I read your post. I had a Blackberry until about almost two months ago, it and I were joined. I used if constantly and it was an addiction. About 18 months ago I switched to an iPhone. I thought I was reborn. I now understood what everyone was excited about. I now live on a remote island and I still have the same iPhone but I use it completely different now. I don’t text. I use to to surf the web on the home network when I am too lazy to turn on the lap but I use more to listen to music than anything else. I have a pay as you go service. It never rings. I never call anyone. No voice mail. It is totally useless when I am in the States. I am totally free.
BTW, I stop wearing a watch a year ago when the battery stopped. I don’t need it since I have no appointments. I feel your freedom.
I was thinking about your comment today. Like you one of the things I love is the app to download music, but I have to try to stop checking in so often.
That feeling of freedom is fantastic without it though. Sounds like you have it well under control.
Sometimes, I think I have everything under control. One of the beauties of living here is the time to think and process everything. At this stage of my life simpler is better.
Nice post and good you are awake Tric.
I did also stop wearing watch for many years ago, because I did feel very stressed by using it.
I got an Android around a half year ago and I use it very much, but I don’t allow anyone to interrupt, while we enjoy our food or in the night, where I remote the sound and let it be in the livingroom.
If I need to stay in the moment, I just remote the sound.
I’ll try to keep to your rules from now on!
Sure Tric the “digits” would stiffen up for lack of exercise, is that not what these gadgets were invented for??
Ha ha. It would be a shame to lose the great typing speed I’ve managed to acquire. 🙂
Guilty. It’s just …. it’s just that there is so much to READ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🙂
I’m right there with you! But I have to try at least to resist. 🙂
Okay…..I’ll try with you…..after I get done reading this next post. 😉
LMAO
I am guilty. I have to cut down on Facebook too.
Just checking in ….. Are you on facebook? We’ll have to start a social media anonymous like the AA 🙂
I am for sure! What’s AA?
AA is alcoholics anonymous.
I always feel like this too, however, when I’ve left it in the car or packed away for the day while I play, I find that I am grateful to NOT have to have the feeling that I have to have it! It usually ends up being a much needed stress free day;) good luck!!
Yes when I have it I can’t imagine life without it, but like you when I forget it or it’s out of battery… oh the freedom.
I nearly got to this point, but now I leave answering texts until I’M ready, and I don’t get notified of anything else…
Mind you if I had an actual iPhone, it might be different!
Best of luck with your iPhone rehab 🙂
Thanks. Like most who are addicted my desire to succeed is great but I think I may be weak! 🙂
you’re not alone. tric – on the radio this morning was a report that apparently we check our smart phones an average 100 times a day !
Have a video I think you’d enjoy. Where will I send the link?
100 times a day is a conservative estimate for me, but a new day dawns and I’ve left my phone in another room.. but I’m on the laptop not sure that counts. 🙂
I have an Android, and I feel naked without it.
Yes it’s something I carry everywhere, either in my hand or a pocket. I can’t believe I have become this kind of person.
It’s addicting. It really is.
My phone (Gizmo) only phones and sends text messages – although it is an android that can tap-dance, do the washing-up recite the alphabet backwards, I have chosen to deprive it of an internet connection. This means that I “only” get phone calls and messages (unless I can hook up to the wireless at home) and that is enough for me, ta. Bigfoot even takes his iphone to the toilet with him. I hope he looks after his kids as well as he looks after his phone.
Ha ha. I am that mother who looks after her children and phone equally!
I really am trying to be less addicted to it, but am not sure how long I’ll last.
this is so funny and i totally get it, tric )
Am I speaking to a fellow addict?
yes, you most certainly are, tric )
Oh dear! I feel out of touch here!!!
Have you not got a super delux, always on, wi fi connected phone? Lucky you!