Am I vain?
Of course not.
Would anyone who is vain,
rarely wear make up?
Or apply just a small amount of hair gel,
to ensure the messed up I don’t care look.
Spend no time at all,
choosing clothes that don’t look too dressy,
but are just so “me”.
Have nails which are unpolished,
prefer to go barefoot,
or wear shoes they can run in at any time?
Vain women on the other hand,
take hours getting ready,
have long flowing locks of usually blonde hair,
wear copious amounts of make up,
have red lips,
wear skirts or dresses,
and always high heels.
This whole look of mine is natural.
It is not the “look at me I’m beautiful” look.
Definitely not a classic feminine look.
It is just me.
However last night I was forced,
to take a good look at my perceived lack of vanity.
Something I was proud of.
I was forced to ask myself,
“Am I vain?”.
Last night I went to bed,
and as usual reached for my book.
I opened the page I was reading,
and all I could see was blur!
I knew there was perfectly readable script there,
but I could not make out one word.
This has been happening now for some weeks,
but I could usually make out the occasional word.
This time I could see nothing.
So I did what I often do,
I rubbed my eyes,
and held that book at arms length.
Yes that worked.
The words were coming into focus again.
Well the majority of the words were,
and the rest I just filled in.
However within a short time,
it became too much effort.
My arms became tired,
I think I need longer ones,
and my brain was slowing down at filling in appropriate words.
Reluctantly I put my book away.
I lay there defeated.
I wanted to read my book.
Then it hit me like slap.
Am I vain?
I refuse to wear glasses that only my husband would see.
My reasons are,
I am too young.
This face does not suit glasses.
I am not a glasses in bed kinda girl!
As I lay there mulling things over,
I realized my tousled hair and “natural” look,
are not as a result of not caring.
They are a well thought out look,
which do in fact take a small amount of time and effort to achieve.
I am not just me, I have a “look”.
It is not a very fashionable, pretty, feminine look,
but I do definitely have “a look”
I settled to sleep eventually,
having realized the painful truth.
I am just as vain as any other woman.
I just take less time to get myself ready,
before presenting myself to the world saying,
“look at me, I am fabulous!”.