Give me patience! I read an article this evening written in The Guardian, titled,‘Fade to grey, why women should stop dying their hair.’ It has left me shouting at the laptop, so as my laptop appears to be deaf I thought I’d shout here instead.
What is it about women that they need to comment on what other women do? There are millions of magazines worldwide, mostly contributed to by women and all read by women, the content of which revolves around photos condemning someones excess weight loss, while on the following page printing photos glorifying perfect bikini bodies. Women are the first to whinge that ‘society’ is placing expectations on them to be a perfect size and look a certain way, but who exactly is ‘society’?
In my life I’ve had many male friends, none of whom I have ever heard comment on women to the degree my female friends do. It would appear to me that it is women themselves who have expectations as to what looks good and what doesn’t. As far as I can see, it is also women themselves in the main, who drive this. The article in the Guardian, written by a woman, is yet another example of this. Here she is, telling us women to embrace who we are and be proud. For that I am delighted and in total agreement with her, but it is the way she has done it that bugs me. She is telling me what way I should look and implying she knows the reason behind what I do. Really? Does she know me? Are all women the same with no hint of our own independence and originality? Are we all dying our hair for the same reason? Should we all be ‘grey and proud’?
I’m not ashamed to admit I dye my hair. I have done since I was in my early twenties following the birth of my first child and the alarmingly rapid change of my hair colour to grey. That would be great if I liked how I looked with grey hair, or if I couldn’t be bothered dying it. However my preference is dark brown with a hint of purple, so what’s a girl to do? Hallelujah, joy of joys, thanks to a small bottle I can have those exact colours and not a hint of grey.
So Ms Camila Palmer please leave me and my grey hair alone. You may think all women should embrace grey, and be proud to wear it, but it’s not for me. I will wear my purple tinged hair with pride, and continue to race to the hair dresser when I see my natural, grey colour sprout through, because that is my choice. This is where you and I part Ms Palmer, for you are telling us women not to do something, I am saying to us women, do what you want. If you are dying your hair because society tells you to, then maybe question why you do it and perhaps in time embrace your grey and be proud. However if you are in my category and dying your hair because you are a purple tinged, over the hill woman, happy with how it makes you look and feel, then don’t bother reading that Guardian article and continue to dye your hair and enjoy being exactly the woman you are and yes, be proud.
photo credit: july09 hairdo left via photopin (license)
31 thoughts on “To dye or not to dye?”
Well said Tric, grey suits some people. But not everyone. Bring on the purple and red!!
Haha. It takes one to know one!
YES! YES! YES! Choosing for ourselves!!! That’s exactly up to each individual. I love what you’ve stated and agree!
Exactly. I think I’d be a different person if I let my grey shine through. My hair colour is an expression of who I am I think.
Yes, it is part of the canvas we choose to express ourselves, and I love that you chose what you wanted and not what is dictated.
Oh, I may be in trouble. 🙂
Do you dye your hair?
I’m 60 and get is still not fir me. It makes me look much older. I dye it dark brown and then I look 50. And it’s not really about age. The grey haired lady in the mirror is not me. The brunette is. I had purple in my hair in January. Next time I go, I want blue and purple, maybe pink. That’s me.
I actually always imagined you were a hair dyeing sort of person.
Yup. I will not go quietly into the grey! 🙂
I think you need to be happy with who you are and what you look like. If that means grey hair then that’s perfect. If, like me, that means the brightest red I could find with streaks of caramel, then that’s perfect too. I’m new to dying, but I love it!! Loved your post!!! 😊
Red head! Isn’t is lovely to be able to change our hair colour if we so wish. I know I love to. I’m off in the morning to put more purple in and for the first time in ages I’m really looking forward to it. It feels a bit rebellious again. 🙂
Right? I think that’s what I love the most about it-that feeling of rebellion and being just a little different. I’m actually a natural redhead, but I don’t regret changing things up a bit! 😊
Have so much fun!
Amen Tric! Sometimes I think the hardest people on women are women! ❤
Yes I think so too. We are a tough crowd to please.
Fade? Fade???? I am NOT fading to grey! I am enticing my hair to silver! I’m with you Tric. If someone wants to color their hair, happily do so. If some of us don’t, we happily shan’t. But I am not fading to anything!!!!! Harumph !
Haha. I burst out laughing when I read this. Loved your reaction to ‘fade’ and that word Harumph is a word I can actually hear as I read it. 🙂
I always said that if i went prematurely grey, I would just dye my hair platinum and be done with it. At 38, I have one grey hair that annoys me, and probably a few more that hide. BUt I do like to go out and get my hair done a couple of times a year. I don’t really give a shit about ageing, but it’s nice to change things up a bit!
I went out today and topped up my purple. It wasn’t exactly due but I did it on protest. It’s really a personal choice I think.
Keep an eye on that grey hair, before you know it, it could have a whole classroom of friends.
i so agree with you – why must we judge each other? i think people do that when they are insecure about themselves. at any age. i unhhappily have had grey roots (and more now), that i happily color to try to match whatever color i think i had or choose to be.
I have gone for the completely unnatural and often wish I’d done this as a teenager. It would have been a great outlet for my rebellious ways.
Cheers. To each their own.
Hear hear 🙂 I dye my hair because I enjoy changing it up, if I was to leave it natural I would be very grey since early twenties after the shock of having kids lol
Yes. Each time I go to the hairdresser I love that moment when she says, ‘Do you want the same colour?’ as in that moment I could actually go any colour I fancy.
Love that way of describing it, ‘charge it up’.
I agree, 1million per cent. It is exactly how I feel when people say “women shouldn’t wear make-up” – when they assume that what we do (whether it’s dying hair, wearing make-up or choosing certain types of clothes) because of some societal pressure when in fact most of us do what we do just because we want to do it. It belittles and demeans women to assume we do things because of societal pressure. I’m sure it’s true in some cases, and I’m certain it’s an issue for younger girls who haven’t found their feet, but lots and lots of us know exactly what we’re doing and why we make the choices we make. Well said!
Thanks, yes indeed we know exactly what we are doing, and I am more than happy to be doing it. I’m not sure when I’ll ever ‘fade to grey’ but it certainly is not looking like any time soon.
Well, you have my support for what it’s worth, Tric. People’s appearance is part of their self-expression. I didn’t read the article, but I think it would have been more helpful if it had said something like, “There’s nothing wrong with going grey if that’s what you want to do.”