For one night only.

My husband got a new job last year, one he loves. Yahoo, you all say isn’t that just wonderful. I thought so too, until the night I met his fellow workmates.

Don’t get me wrong they were all great company and to be honest I clicked with them instantly. We chatted at length until one of them said “Oh and wait until the Christmas party, you will love it, it’s a mad night”. Great I hear you say once more, well you would be for one night onlywrong. For the minute I heard Christmas Party, I thought ‘dresses, shoes, makeup, girlishness”. My heart sank further and further as I listened in horror as they excitedly spoke of the enormous occasion it was, with everyone making a huge effort, “There’s even a prize for best dressed”. Well I can tell you that was the last straw. My hearing shut down, as I began to travel away from those around me. I picked up all thoughts of a Christmas party and I bundled them up, before ‘losing them’ in the further most recess of my mind.

Until today.

Today I received a text from my OH, “Partners expected Sunday night”, and out jumped those thoughts I’d hidden away. Christmas party. Nooooo! Feck! There was no way out.So here I am slowly awakening to the reality of a Christmas Party in February, with hundreds of people I do not know, all dressed up to the nines.

I do not exaggerate when I say to you that dresses, handbags and make up are alien to me. Those men among you who are reading I ask you to imagine preparing yourselves for such a night out, but as a woman. Can you walk in heels? Can you sit in a dress? Would you feel like yourself if you were dressed up as a woman?

I’m well impressed with you if you would be comfortable doing so, but it is one very difficult task for me. I can remember a comment made by a friend of mine, who had more than the recommended level of alcohol in her at the time. It was my birthday party and if I do say so myself I looked alright (not in a dress), standing in front of me she looked me up and down, then raised her bottle of beer Man in  a dresssaying, “Fair play to ye, ye look great, but you just don’t do sexy do ye?”. In a way I took it as a compliment as I have no desire to ‘do sexy’, but I’m hoping you get the picture I’m painting here.

I enjoy being a woman, I love a night out. However there is a boyish part of me which does not sit well with girlishness. Shopping, nails, beauty products, spa treatment are not on my radar, and nights out all dolled up are a total nightmare. I can’t even walk like a lady!

However there is no getting away from this one. So much to the delight and amusement of my friends when I tell them the news, a shop load of dresses will be donated to me to try on. Accessories I wouldn’t even have thought of will be supplied, and there will be much laughter at my unease.

So look out world, next Sunday for one night only Tric Kearney will be making an appearance live in Cork, Ireland, dressed as a woman. Oh and before you ask, there will be no photos.

photo credit: rjrgmc28 via photopin cc
photo credit: gwilmore via photopin cc

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42 thoughts on “For one night only.

  1. You poor thing! If I could not wear pants and carry all my things in my pockets then I would stay home. (I have not worn a dress since high school – both marriages were in pants.) πŸ˜› Good luck, Tric!

    1. A kindred spirit. Thanks Jackie.
      Even though I will be dying ‘all dressed up’ I’d not consider not going as it would be a really big night for my husband, and I will enjoy it when I’m there. It’s just one of those things in life we have to do.
      I can’t believe you wore pants to both your weddings. Lucky you.

      1. Cross my heart, I wore pants both times. If I were forced into a dress I would have caught pneumonia and died. πŸ˜› I’m also very practical – I bought outfits I could wear other places and to work.

        1. I think, Tric, that I would be the one wearing yellow or mauve to a Christmas party. My mother said I was a rebel from the start but you and I know it is because for once, I am in full control.

          YOU, my dear, will look smashing!

    1. Not a chance. It will be bad enough having to get all dolled up. I remember when I wore a dress last year to my nephews wedding my brother shared a photo on facebook, needless to say the comments were highly entertaining… at my expense. πŸ™‚

  2. I think you should have a night of trying on clothes and modeling them for your friends. Make it a party, complete with the beverage of your choice. Just make sure you confiscate all cell phones and any other cameras as your guests arrive!

    1. I would love to be able to do that, but honestly I’d be mortified even in front of my friends dressing up! They on the other hand would love it. It’s just me and a mirror I’m afraid, then a deep breath and off I’ll go.

    1. Thanks for saying that. I think I ve very little choice as comfy for me is odd one out at this event. I will call in my fashion advisors and see what they come up with. Might find a compromise. Fingers crossed.

  3. Oh, I feel your discomfort! Much more comfortable in my comfy clothing than all dressed up. Since they are giving out awards, are you sure it’s not a costume ball?

  4. I commiserate, Tric. I have exactly the same issue with girly clothing and make-up. And the fact that even if I manage to carry it off in theory, the façade slips when I either trip over my own feet, burp or ask for a pint instead of the girly cocktails every other woman is clutching in her varnished claws. I say put on your Rita the Riveter dungarees, slap on a bit of red lipstick and change the world. Hugs xx

  5. Ah Tric…..my heart goes out to you. Truly, completely, and painfully it does. I don’t do girly well, at all. I’m all woman. But frilly, no need. I’m a power woman. Just as feminine. But not in a dress. I’m just shaking my head in commiseration with you…….

    1. Shaking my head right back at you. I know it’s not good to use drink as a crutch but I’m definitely on crutches for a swift one before going out next Sunday.

        1. I know I am tempted to do both, but I’ll do it as he would for me. (well he wouldn’t wear a dress but he would do something he didn’t want to)

        2. Ugh. Us and our committed men folk. It’s a blessing. Right? Right. I would as well. However…..I do believe we get to a certain age and we might both look at each other, and to use an Irish loved expression, both say “feck it” let’s both wear jeans!!!!!! πŸ™‚ Then cackle like fools.

          Then dress up and go. πŸ˜‰

  6. I am exactly the same way. I don’t believe there’s a feminine bone in my body. Getting dressed up means my black jeans instead of the blue ones, and a long sleeved shirt with a collar. Oh yea, and try to remember to brush my hair. πŸ˜›

    1. Haha. I laughed when you added ‘oh yea and try to remember to brush my hair’. I’ve spiky hair so hair gel does the job perfectly. I’m afraid black jeans wont work next Sunday. I’ll survive for one night, I think. πŸ™‚

  7. As a man who is happier to “dress down” than dress up, I’m just pleased that “business dress” at work is very relaxed. No need for a tie, shirt only has to have a collar, polo or rugby shirts are fine. I know and empathise with your predicament. Enjoy your day and please post some pics of the others in attendance.

    1. Oh that’s an idea, post other peoples photo, but I think I’ll stick with my blanket ban.
      Your work place sounds very relaxing alright. Perfect for you. My Oh wears suits everyday and a tie. He’d be in a spin if he had to chose smart casual clothes. We’re all so different really

      1. It’s just as well we’re not all the same, how boring that would be. I leave the dressing up to others as they, some of them anyway, look good dressed up, I look like a wolf in sheep clothing, lol πŸ˜‰

    1. Yes awkward probably describes it best. I will take a small drink which will make it all a little less awful! Once I’m there I’ll enjoy the night (I hope)

  8. Cool… you have to share photos!
    Studying the lead photo as I read your post I suspected that you’d put it up to your husband to dress up as a woman to see what it felt like?!! πŸ˜€

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