I have really tried to write today. However I have trashed it all. It’s Christmas time and I am just not able to write about anything, but the sadness I feel for my friend on the loss of her lovely son. So in order to spare you my misery I am going to do a … More More than words can ever say.
Christmas Eve is such a wonderful day when you have children. It is full of anticipation and excitement thinking of the special visitor who will be calling later. From early morning my youngest had acted like the town crier, “One more day”, was her mantra. All the presents were wrapped and under the tree. Much feeling … More A Christmas miracle or wonderful coincidence?
Are you someone who lives with regret? Maybe it’s an old regret, perhaps about your childhood, or schooling, loves lost, or chances wasted? I have regrets aplenty. But if I were honest and could go back, would I do things differently? The past brought me to where I am today. Am I happy with that? … More No regrets.
Today you would be fourteen. Not yet an adult but not a child. Even though we will mark your birthday today, and think of you as another year older, in our minds eye you will always be thirteen. Perhaps it would be more truthful to say, that to most of us you will always be … More Happy Birthday Dan.
Once or twice a week a couple of friends and I go for a walk. It is quite a long trek of about 8km, off the beaten track. This walk has become a huge part of our friendship. Prior to December 2012 we walked this walk with no real cares. We chatted about family, relationships, … More Walking through grief.
Last night you were celebrated in the local GAA club. You would have really enjoyed it. €6000 was donated in your name to the Cork Leukemia Association. That makes over €25,000 raised in your name so far. All your football team were there. All except one. Those boys are growing up before our eyes, even … More Celebrating your memory.
Grief is a strange emotion. For a time it is all consuming. Eating into my every moment. And then it begins to recede. Burrowing deep inside me, taking up residence next to my heart. It becomes a lurker, on occasions out of nowhere it rises to the surface. At other times Grief hits me with a … More Four minus one.
Last Tuesday, I felt a real drive to go and see Dan. To stand with him and to remember. I put a single rose in my car, thinking to myself how ridiculous I was. A rose is definitely not a gift I would ever have brought him, nor would it have been appreciated in any … More I brought you a rose. How you would have hated that.
“Oh my God, he’s gone! He died. He actually died!” These are the thoughts that arrest me, out of the blue regularly. I might be driving, or out buying groceries, perhaps out having fun with friends, or teaching at the pool, when without any warning I remember. Dan died. When this moment hits it quite … More Gone.
When our young friend Dan died in November it sent a seismic shock through our village. It was the second death of a child within three weeks. Understandably it affected many, with hundreds coming to see him off. I have met some mothers who told me that as they passed the church that day, knowing … More The ripple effect.