Children can be so cruel, or maybe it’s just mine!

I am a mother, a long time, over twenty years in fact, although I do
look a mere child myself.
In all that time I have regularly bestowed great wisdom on my children.
All those years of advice, and do you know what?
I don’t believe they’ve appreciated any of it.
In fact they even think they know better!

“Put on your coat or you’ll get a cold”.photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/carbonnyc/3029294932/">CarbonNYC</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com">photopin</a> <a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/">cc</a>
“All this will end in tears”,
“Don’t come to me crying when it breaks”.
“If you don’t listen in school you’ll never learn anything”.

Take the other day for example I tackled the very important issue of self esteem.

I said to one of my three daughters, whilst she was scrutinizing her reflection in the mirror,
“you know, I said, I get up every day, and I feel great. Inside I feel 21.
Until I look in the mirror and I’m brought back down to earth with a bang.
So my advice is, Don’t look in the mirror”.

She listened to me and nodded, whilst continuing to stare into the mirror.
A while later she looked at me, in a pitying sort of way, and said “You know Mum, I think you could do with looking in the mirror more often!”

Another time one of my girls was getting ready to go out.
She was wondering which of two outfits she would wear.
In she came to me, as I was lounging in the sitting room.
“Mom, which should I wear?”. Then she hesitated, whilst looking me up and down.
(now I will admit the words “no effort” would have come to mind re my attire that evening),
She then said, “Actually it doesn’t matter”, and off she went calling for her sister.

Whilst I feel my daughters were overly dismissive of my advice in those previous two examples,
I admit that I do have among my great strengths, a few weaknesses.photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/hownowdesign/5237621999/">hownowdesign</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com">photopin</a> <a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/">cc</a>
One is a very poor aptitude for arts and crafts.

While looking at blogs on the internet one night someone had posted a beautiful array of cards and crafts they had made out of ordinary everyday things.
I showed it to my gang and said “Wow, what would you lot say if I made those”.
One replied quickly “I’d say, it’s a miracle”.
The other came over for a look and said “If you were to try to make those Mom,
I’d say, Bless, at least you tried your best!”.

As you can see by my examples my children are on occasions not exactly appreciative of me.
So in an effort to make them love and appreciate me more, I used to say on occasions,
“I’ll not be around forever. You’ll miss me when I’m gone”.
However I have stopped saying this, as they had begun to make a list of how they would remember me.
“Ah Jesus, where’s my keys? Come on lads, anyone know where they are?”.
“Mom, there’s a smell of burning” or “Lovely Mom, what are these supposed to be?”,
“Would anyone have any spare money around, I’ll pay you back”.
“I only put your boots, shoes, runners, jacket on two minutes ago, I was just about to put them in your room again”.
“Ah for fecks sake”.photo credit: Paul-W via photopin cc

All this gives me pause for thought.
I remember my mothering of my children as loving, caring and wise.
It would appear I may be somewhat deluded.
How I really will be remembered I shudder to think.
But one thing I do think my gang will say is,
“We had great fun”.

photo credit: CarbonNYC via photopin cc
photo credit: hownowdesign via photopin cc
photo credit: Paul-W via photopin cc


32 thoughts on “Children can be so cruel, or maybe it’s just mine!

  1. I would never get away with speaking to my Mom that way… your daughters are still young, once they get out of the house and get their heads out of the clouds they will be much more receptive to all of that… in the mean time you should say something
    when your daughters make comments like “What does that mean?” It will force them to see that what they are saying is unkind, because no one wants to explain a mean comment.

    1. I think you missed my humour in this post. My children are in their teens and twenties now and know my limitations. It is just them joking with me and to be honest I enjoy it. Trust me I can give it back equally, They learned it from me. And as I say, we do have great fun.

  2. When your kids will be a little more old, they will show you, how much you did mean for them, with your opinions, no matter they still agree or disagree, what you told them. At least they are honest. For me this just mean, that they are right for us. We don’t need our kids to listen to all without minding themselves. We learn them to be independent and they are also allowed to be in doubt about our opinions. A part of life too. Thanks for sharing.
    Irene

    1. Glad you got it’s humour. When my kids were young I never knew parenting them when they are older would be such fun. And I’ll continue to give them nuggets of my wisdom!

  3. oh i have absolutely no doubt they would say it was fun, and that you were a great mother to boot! at times i have understood that it may be our children’s job to bring us back down to earth once in a while, lest our egos grow too big. fat chance of that )

  4. I know by your storytelling that you are great fun. I often think of our homes as similar, except for the two mom thing! Our children our used to dysfunctional….proud of it actually! Weve learned to love being different….. Your family seems fun….and I am fairly certain you will be held in high regards by those little cherubs! 🙂

    1. I like to hope we are close, only time will tell. I remember my mom replying to a question I asked her once. I said it was amazing how we all love to visit and be with her. She replied, because I try to make it fun so you will all want to come back. I hope I am doing the same.

  5. Love this! You make me laugh…I’m funnier inside than out, and you inspire me to lighten up! It’s wonderful that your kids have learned to laugh and have a great sense of humor – what a great gift!

  6. I think your kids remembering growing up and having great fun with you is a fantastic way to be remembered and loved. I had such a joyful time with my daughter this past weekend, remembering growing up and the things that we laugh about. 🙂 What beautiful parenting and childhood moments, when both sides can laugh. 🙂

    1. Yes you’re right. When we go up home to my moms house we be in stitches remembering times past. I hope to be still doing that for many more years to come. Laughter and fun, there’s nothing like it.

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